Coping with Divorce During the Holidays
The holiday season is a time when families gather and celebrate the love and affection they have for each other. However, this time of year can be particularly difficult when you are going through a divorce. Despite all of the stress and hostility that may accompany your pending divorce, this time of year may leave you longing for the familiar holiday experiences you and your children shared with your soon-to-be former spouse.
While it may be impractical for you and your children to share the holiday season with your spouse together as a family, you can still make the holidays memorable, fun, and free from stress when you keep these suggestions into mind.
Put Aside Your Emotions for the Time Being
If you and your spouse parted on hostile terms, it can be very difficult for you to keep your emotions in check during the holidays. You may resent the changes that you and your children must endure and you might be tempted to take out your hostility on your spouse by trying to keep the kids from him or her during the holiday break. However, for your children’s sake, it is important that you put aside your emotions and resentment for the few days of the holiday season.
The divorce surely is difficult on them as well, and they may feel guilty about having to spend time with your soon-to-be former spouse during the break. Rather than make this change any harder on them, you should encourage them to have fun with your spouse and assure them that you want them to be happy during the holiday season. As the blog of one family law attorney DG Tucson states, “Divorce doesn’t have to be hard” and it is important to have a “shared interest in the welfare of the children’.
Try to Maintain Traditions
Even with your spouse’s absence from the family, you can still maintain some or all of your family’s holiday traditions. If your children are accustomed to leaving out treats for Santa Claus and waking up to special presents from St. Nick, you can still keep this tradition without having to eliminate it because your spouse is no longer in the house.
Likewise, if your family enjoys going to Christmas Eve services at church, you can still make that outing with your children. Having familiar holiday routines incorporated into your new life as a single parent can help you and your children relax and enjoy the holiday season.
Establish New Family Traditions
As you prepare for your life as a single parent, you can embrace this change by establishing new traditions for you and your children during the holiday season. Introducing these new traditions can give you and your children something to look forward to during the Christmas and New Year’s break and help you form new and meaningful memories that you can look back on in the future.
The new traditions can be whimsical and fun or they can be somber and spiritual. If you are unsure of what traditions to introduce, you could take advice from your children and make this effort one that is cooperative and meaningful.
Going through a divorce during the holidays can be stressful. You and your children can get past the stress and worry by taking these steps and by resolving to make the best of your new life together.
A mother of four, writer Melanie Fleury cannot begin to think how heartbreaking a divorce would be to her family. She has seen many of her friends become emotionally and financially devastated after a divorce. She used the website of family law attorney DG Tucson to learn more about divorce and the laws pertaining to it.
Photo Credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/photographybycolby/9482989251/
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